What to Do When I Become a Koi and Fall into the Male God’s Bathtub

WDBKFMGB Chapter 34 – Super Fierce Crybaby

{Please read the original translations on SurrealSkyTranslations instead of supporting TL aggregator sites. Thanks!}

Xi Guican was imprisoned inside the icy cold machine, and a piercing white light shot into his eyes. In the brief moment before he lost consciousness, waves of spiritual energy poured into his spiritual sea of consciousness. 

This was…… 

The real brainwashing procedure! 

Because of this terrible realization, Xi Guican felt his whole body turn cold. He desperately and recklessly tried to break free, but the previous automatic ‘quit game’ function that worked with just a thought was now completely unresponsive.

A robotic voice then extinguished Xi Guican’s last hope. 


If you can read this, you are reading on an aggregator site that stole the translation. Please read on the original site. Thank you!

[Di–intense mood swings from the player has been detected

[Warm reminder, this game will not conduct any actions that will harm the player. Everything is done based upon your illness and in consideration of you. Wishing you happy gaming and good health! 】

 A whirlpool silently appeared above his spiritual sea, and it continuously emitted spiritual waves. 

A spiritual pulse that overturned oceans and lands rose up from his bone marrow, overlaying his white bones with a coat of fake flesh, and building layers upon layers of phantom images within his desolate spiritual sea.[1]

This was a terrifying brainwashing experiment that could even tamper with the depths of the soul.

Almost no one was immune from this brainwashing experiment, except Xi Guican. 

Because his body actually contained two souls. 

The memories belonging to Xi Guican began to blur and were wrapped up in layers of silk-like spiritual waves.With all the memories covered in a thick gauze, his world looked like it was painted with a heavy snowfall. The sky above, the Earth below, and encompassed in all four directions by snow-white surroundings, all was wrapped together in a silver lining as pale as a piece of white paper, willing others to blemish it.[2]

Just as everything was about to be rewritten, a small hole suddenly appeared amidst the thick snow. A little white tiger with red eyes popped his head out of the snow. He seemed to have just been awakened from a deep sleep, muddled and unaware of the situation.

A fine piece of snow drifted onto the tip of his nose, and the red-eyed little white tiger sneezed. This sneeze drove away his sleepiness, and the little white tiger, who finally realized what had happened, was surprisingly angry—— 

ROAR! Who was it? ! Froze me again! ! ! 

A childish tiger roar resounded through the lonely world of ice and snow. With great difficulty, he pulled his paws up from the snow and tried to get out. However, he seemed to be injured and every time he moved, he would feel a heart-piercing pain all over his body. 

The red agate-like eyes were angry enough that they were about to spew out flames. With a sudden burst out of strength and a loud bang, he lifted his whole body out of the snow——

A pair of very, very large Zerg wings suddenly popped out from the snow! The wings were beautiful and slender, but the only regrettable thing was that one wing was broken at the root, tattered and stained with flesh and blood. 

The little monster tried hard to fly upwards with his remaining Zerg wings. But, each time he tried, he would shake and stumble, as if he would fall from the air at any moment. 

His red eyes were full of violence and intent to kill. He desperately flapped the Zerg wing in mid-air. 

He flew halfway and fell. Then, he gritted his teeth and got up before taking off again while filled with murderous intent. Because of the broken wing, the little monster could not control the balance of his body, and every time he fell, the broken wing would bleed out. 

The pure white snowy field was covered with splatters of blood, like a painting of plum blossoms in the snow[3].

Numerous falls and numerous injuries, but the little monster became increasingly violent with each, and took to the air stubbornly even after repeated defeats. After a countless failures, he was finally able to control the broken wings and fly shakily towards the whirlpool in the sky—— 

He blocked the whirlpool with his own body. 


Under the impact of the violent waves of spiritual energy, the originally already severely damaged wing was ripped off from the roots and fell from his back. It floated gently like a fallen leaf onto the blanket of snow. 

The little monster who never cried no matter how much pain he was in, the moment he saw the wings break off, he finally broke down and cried loudly. 

He sat on the whirlpool in the sky, crying loudly. In the expansive world of ice and snow, the immature cries of the little monster echoed outwards over and over again.


For an entire day, whenever He Ruge opened the game, he couldn’t see Little White Tiger. Each time, (the game) showed that Little White Tiger was still in the middle of undergoing the brainwashing experiment. 

What will change after the brainwashing experiment is over? Would Little White Tiger completely…… forget about him?

And what was a little monster? 

When He Ruge thought about this, he removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose a little irritably. Under these circumstances, he didn’t really have a choice. The game didn’t give him any other options, so he could only click to complete the task. 

It would be great if this was not a game. 

It would be great if he had the ability to act according to his own wishes in the game.

He Ruge once again remembered the holographic gaming helmet with the asking price of “8888.88 RMB”. What was the true role of that helmet? Would there be more available options? In this way, when faced with a situation similar to today’s, he will not be pushed towards a cliff with no choice but to bite the bullet and complete the task. 


Why so expensive? It must be expensive for a good reason. But, why was it so expensive?

He Ruge was uneasy while writing today and couldn’t concentrate at all. As soon as he thought about the little white tiger who was about to be brainwashed and lose his memory, his heart would instantly become numb, carrying a degree of anxiety and irritability.

This feeling wasn’t the same as the restlessness that came with “returning to the pre-liberation period”, but rather was an even more inexplicable self-blame as if having lost something very important. 

However, there was nothing he could do because it was just a game, and there was no second option available to him in the game. Thus, he could only helplessly choose to complete the task. 

From the very beginning of the experiments, he was never given the option to refuse. 

It was also impossible for him to jump into the game and pull Little White Tiger out of the brainwashing room.

He Ruge glanced at the picture of the little white tiger on the writing program’s interface, but his creases between his eyes didn’t relax. Decisively, he closed the document and opened up the game again. This time, Little White Tiger finally came out. 

The little white tiger who came out was not contained in an iron cage this time. He had completed the brainwashing process, and so his identity had undergone some subtle changes. 

Though he was still an experimental subject, he didn’t have as many constraints as before. However, Little White Tiger still took the initiative to walk himself into the cage and even sat down inside like a little master. But, the good habit of closing the door on his own initiative had disappeared. 

He didn’t know if it was an illusion or due to the brainwashing experiment, but He Ruge kept feeling like……

The Little White Tiger in front of his eyes was very unfamiliar. 

It’s not an unfamiliarity caused by a loss of memories, but rather an unfamiliarity of a whole different person. 

[“Rebirth” has been completed successfully! 

Total experiment time: 1*24 hours 

Survival rate: 100% 

Surviving subjects: No. 20, etc. 

Your performance in the experiment: satisfactory (sent the experimental subject to the brainwashing room)]

[Your performance in the first three experiments was overall excellent, and you have obtained the opportunity to participate in the fourth experiment “Accelerated Growth”: 

It is said that weeding out bad seedlings encourages growth, but the degenerate people of the Starry Sea Orphanage do not have the patience to wait for young experimental subjects to grow up slowly. The degenerates decide to inject gene altering solutions into No.20, allowing him to complete seven years of growth in one week. 】 

【Daily Task: 

Responsible for No. 20’s three meals a day, and injecting him with the gene altering solution on time] 

He Ruge clicked on the cage and walked towards the location of the new experiment on the first floor.

After arriving at Room 104, Little White Tiger himself opened the cage, dragged his small cotton nest out from the cage, dragged it to a corner in a daze, and sat down on the nest, staring at He Ru Ge indifferently. 

This was an aggressiveness displayed by a beast who was dissatisfied with the invasion of its territory. 

He Ruge had no doubt that if he took one more step forward, he would be attacked by Little White Tiger. 

Those blue eyes were as cold as ice, but it was different from the pure indifference and disgust when they first met. The gaze from those eyes, at this moment, carried a manic and scorching wildness, like a fire blazing beneath the surface of the ice, where the flame could melt through the ice at any time. 

He Ruge clicks on Little White Tiger’s status.


[Disgusted]: No.20 wishes to kill everyone in Starry Sea Orphanage, including you 

[Awakened]: The little monster is finally awake, he desires to carry out an act that will overturn the heavens and Earth. 

……It turns out that Little White Tiger was really gone, and what appeared now was the little monster that the game had been foreshadowing. 

He Ruge had always thought that the status of a sleeping “little monster” meant that the little white tiger would transform into a little monster, or that he would gradually become a little monster due the repetitive experiments, causing him to become physically and psychologically distorted into a little monster. 

However, He Ruge never would have thought that a little monster actually lived inside Little White Tiger’s body. If the little monster woke up, then where was his little white tiger? 

He use the mouse and randomly clicked all over the little monster at a loss. 

【Touch Head】(locked) 

【Touch Back】(locked) 

【Squeeze Paws】(locked)


All of the options for intimate interaction were locked and in a gray-colored state. 

The little monster’s initial affection level for him was lower than that of Little White Tiger’s. At least, when He Ruge interacted with Little White Tiger in the beginning, Little White Tiger would still let him touch his head, although he would be swiped at if he patted his head. 

Why didn’t Little White Tiger continue to scratch at him then? 

He Ruge reached deep into his memories. If he recalled correctly, it seems to be when his glasses had fallen off? 

……Did the glasses have some sort of special settings?

He Ruge clicked on his outfit, took off his black glasses, and looked back at the little monster expectantly. The little monster in the cotton nest appeared indifferent and gave He Ruge a vicious glare. 

When the little monster, who looked exactly like Little White Tiger, made such a fierce expression, He Ruge really felt hurt. It was a heartbreaking feeling. 

He clicked on [Talk] with his mouse. 


【Roar! “Roll!” 】 

He Ruge: “……” 

He Ruge then clicked on [Feed], and the game automatically placed the solution one meter away from the little monster by default. Thus, He Ruge wasn’t even given a chance to interact with the little monster.

The game arranging everything automatically was probably for players’ sake. If one finally managed to fill up their favorability levels, but then ended up being attacked by the other in the next second, even if they had a heart of steel, it would still be shattered into pieces under this huge change. 

Although he understood the logic behind this, when he saw the little monster full of hostility and separated by a whole diagonal length of the room, saying that He Ruge wasn’t sad would be a lie. 

He doesn’t want a little monster, he only wanted Little White Tiger. But, he also doesn’t want to be hated by the little monster because the little monsters looked exactly like Little White Tigers.

He Ruge felt like he was a scumbag. His White Moonlight (lover) had left him, so he found a perfect substitute. Yet, while complaining that the substitute was not the same as the White Moonlight, he was saddened that the substitute did not love him.

Depressedly, He Ruge moved the character to leave the room. After leaving the room, He Ruge wanted to walk back into the room to look at the little monster. 

However, the little monster had made it very clear he did not want to see He Ruge. 

Thus, the witty He Ruge held down the space bar and used the Secret Observation skill. 

In the old, black-and-white camera-like lens, the little monster turned its head laboriously, licking his right Zerg wing cherishingly. He licked it in solitude for a while before he began to cry silently. 

Crying pitifully.

{Please read the original translations on SurrealSkyTranslations instead of supporting TL aggregator sites. Thanks!}


[1]Original: 铺天盖地的精神波翻尸捣骨而来,将森森白骨覆上虚假的皮肉, 在荒芜的灵魂原野上建起一座座海市蜃楼. Trying to translate this paragraph caused my brain to ascend lmao. If anyone has a different translation for this, do let me know and I’ll update this version. Meaning: the brainwashing experiment is rewriting his entire being

[2] White Paper: symbolizing that the brainwashing made him easier to influence

[3] Painting of plum blossoms: Direct translation: Trekking in search of red plum blossoms in the snow, a common Chinese art motif

The previous chapter was a bit short, but that gave me enough time to finish translating the entirety of chapter 34 in one go ^^

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