What to Do When I Become a Koi and Fall into the Male God’s Bathtub

WDBKFMGB Chapter 29 – Blowing up the Laboratory

Chapter 29 is a sponsored chapter!! Thank you, Nebulae, for your support!

Trigger warnings: descriptions of suffering and depression.


{Please read the original translations on SurrealSkyTranslations instead of supporting TL aggregator sites. Thanks!}

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The little rabbit was curled up in the iron cage, his silver Zerg wings hung down feebly. However, his expression was peaceful and content, as if having a good dream.

No.19

【Is Deceased】

Having long prepared the “Little Goblin Ball” in the backpack, He Ruge’s heart trembled. He immediately activated the Goblin Ball on the little rabbit for fear of missing the three-second capture timeframe.

[Yes/No. Use “Little Goblin Ball” for No.19]

【Yes】

【No】

Was this person really the same fan who never replied with more than five words during their private conversation, the same person who was as cold as the South Pole?!

The red and white little goblin ball was suspended in mid-air, casting a gentle halo that enveloped the little rabbit.

[A high degree of favorability from the capture target had been detected! 】

[Capture successful! 】

The red cap from the top half of the goblin ball then vanished, leaving only the white hemisphere half of the ball. In the center of the white hemisphere was a small carrot symbol.

A miniature little rabbit laid in the white hemisphere. The little rabbit was sleeping soundly with his eyes closed, its two small paws grasping the edge of the hemisphere. It had silver wings that were too long to fit in the hemisphere, so the tip of the wings hung outside the Goblin Ball .

Time passed slowly while he was reading the various retweets and confessions from this multiple personality fan. Rong Xu was initially taken aback when he saw Lotus Seed Paste and Orange Stuffing’s first Weibo post tonight, but then he smiled helplessly.

[Name]: Little Goblin Ball

[Quality]: Rare

[Evaluation]: What’s in the Goblin ball? A cute little rabbit! Whenever you are in danger, just shout “Go, Pikachu,” and you can wake Ruan Ruan and let him come out to help you~ When you are in mortal danger, you don’t need to summon the Goblin Ball and Ruan Ruan will come out automatically~

[Ruan Ruan’s Abilities]: “Attracts 100% attention” When the cute Ruan Ruan appears, regardless of man or woman, old or young, good or bad, their attention will be fully attracted by Ruan Ruan~

[Limitations]: Ruan Ruan has fallen asleep in the Goblin Ball. He is dreaming of his parents. Don’t wake him too often, let him have a peaceful and beautiful sleep~

After closing Weibo, Rong Xu again looked through the latest entertainment news.

The Goblin ball was returned to the backpack, but Little Rabbit’s corpse still lay in the iron cage. He Ruge suddenly experienced a surreal sense of dissociation, and he reopened the backpack to make sure that Ruan Ruan was still inside the Goblin Ball.

Being able to see mother and father in his dream, that should be the best ending for Ruan Ruan.

He Ruge pushed at his glasses frame in a complicated mood.

He still remembered the excitement of being surrounded by twenty little cuties when he first started this game. Unexpectedly…… there was only one cutie left.

He Ruge looked at the little white tiger in the cage, his feeling particularly complicated. Little White Tiger looked silently at the little rabbit in the cage. His blue eyes were filled with complex emotions that did not match his age. There was grief and depressions, but amongst these negative emotions, there was also a softness that had never appeared before.

A gentle and sad hue of blue.

Reminiscent of the sky above a church, or the waters of a solemn, still lake.

When He Ruge was faced with such a pair of blue eyes, it was no longer possible to describe the little white tiger as childishly fierce, because at this moment, the sharpness of his whole being had melted away like ice and snow.

He used the mouse to click on [Talk].

No.20

[He has also become a star. All of us will eventually become a star. I seem to have never told you what my name is.】

[Please always remember it.】

[My name is Xi Guican. If I die one day, it means that I have finally become a star and have returned to brilliance.】

Little White Tiger smiled at He Ruge.

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The way Little White Tiger smiled was truly too cute, and He Ruge couldn’t help but take a screenshot.

Because Crow needed him for something, He Ruge left Room 214 and walked to the staff dormitory. As soon as he opened the door, he froze——

The dormitory was stuffed full of various laser weapons and energy bombs. Crow took off his mask and revealed a face that hadn’t seen the sun in so long that it was a ghastly pale. He sat on a large energy cannon and smoked. The smoke lingered in the room, and the scarlet ember light from the cigarette butt flashed in the dimness.

Crow

【You came. 】

[The higher-ups have already begun to check Golden Python’s identity. I was responsible for the search target who was on the second floor, and I must give an explanation. 】

[My explanation……]

He blew out a ring of smoke and said hoarsely:

[Is to bomb this laboratory. 】

    

Xi Guican was lying in the cotton nest and looking at No.19 through the bars of the iron cage. The little rabbit was sipping milk tea. From his perspective, he could see tears falling from the little rabbit’s eyes and splashing into the milk tea. Drop by drop, the small water beads created tiny ripples.

They were like the energy bombs that blew up Golden Python in the night sky, when the outermost energy waves had not yet dissipated, and made ripples of light that remained suspended in the atmosphere.

When he looked up at the sky at that time, he suddenly remembered Golden Python’s wish, “To Fly high and far into the sky and become a star.” 

He really became a star.

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Acting as if nothing had happened just now, Rong Xu greeted the other party with a smile, and Qin Cheng naturally responded with a calm nod.

There were many people who would never be able to achieve their dreams their entire lives. So, it was good. The moment he rushed out of the cage, Xi Xing should have been extremely happy.

His heart that had previously been frozen solid suddenly showed signs of cracks. Within his spiritual soul that had long since dried up, seemingly trivial amounts of foreign emotions poured in. 

They were others’ joys. Unreal joys.

But, Xi Guican felt moved by it.

Xi Guican had always believed that joy was a luxury only others could have and had nothing to do with himself. He lacked the ability to empathize, lacked the ability to perceive emotion, and the joys, sorrows, anger and emotions of outsiders were always covered with a veil, making them vague and surreal.

But at this moment, through that thin veil, Xi Guican was able to feel the soft and warm touch of joy.

Not fear, not disgust, not indifference. 

Nor was it the sense of despair he had previously experienced. 

That day, back then, the golden python had died in front of him. When his cloudy eyes lost their light and his large body suddenly collapsed, a suffocating despair spread out and enveloped his entire being.

For so many years, he seemed to have only experienced negative emotions. Despair, madness, collapse and suppression. 

Now, he was experiencing so, so many different emotions that it practically overwhelmed his perception.

It turns out that the golden python could leave the world this happily?

Obviously, this was just a game, but Xi Guican couldn’t help but take it seriously. Everything was too realistic, and he felt that he needed some sense of false comfort to numb himself.

Little White Tiger turned his head to look at He Ruge who was holding him. The young man’s eyes nervously looked upwards. His black eyes were unblinking, and bright, dazzling light reflected in those dark eyes like a starry night sky.

They looked so nice.

Little White Tiger quietly watched him for a long time.

He wanted to tell He Ruge that for people like them, death as an ending wasn’t the most terrifying thing. Rather, lingering aimlessly in the world until dying an unknown death was the most terrifying. That kid of quiet death gave people the illusion–

That maybe they never existed in the first place.

He wanted to comfort the person in front of him, but when Xi Guican recalled the moment he destroyed the Starry Sea Orphanage and broke through the cage, he realized that he wasn’t even happy at that time.

…because that day, the monster slumbering in his body had been released. It wasn’t him who broke through the cage that day. It was that monster. 

It was that monster who broke free from the restraints of reason, ruined everything, and also ruined himself.

That horrifying, slumbering monster was him, yet wasn’t him.

Xi Guican could feel that the monster in his body had become extremely weak, so weak that it only remained on its last breath as it lingered in his body. If there was a knife that could cross through the body, Xi Guican was wholly willing to gouge out the monster himself, just like cutting out rotten flesh from a wound, and separate the monster from his body.

However……

That monster was not rotten flesh. It was part of his heart, and every pulse of his left atrium, every breath that he took, was proof of the monster’s existence.

In fact, Xi Guican always felt that he was immersed in a swamp bog, with a dark night sky looming above his head. He meandered in the swamp for a long, long time, and when he was tired, the monster would appear, dominating his body and continue to wander aimlessly.

Clearly, he and the monster had lived mutually dependent on each other for so many years, yet when he finally left the swamp, he immediately wanted to cull the monster from his body, to rip the Zerg wings from his body.

He had walked out of Starry Sea Orphanage and walked to the Federation, only to find that the Federation was just another swamp. The sky above his head was still the same darkness. 

He was a wanderer who struggled in life. He had never belonged to any place, and no place welcomed him.

How did Xi Guican come to have this disease? In fact, Xi Guican had already vaguely guessed the truth.

But, so what if he guessed the truth. He understood these people. Even he wanted to destroy himself with his own two hands — he who was rotten from the roots, from the bones.

He knew, and only he knew, that he was never a monster created by the Starry Sea Orphanage. He was……

Born a monster.

Early the next morning, before dawn, Rong Xu silently crept out of bed. Without disturbing Qin Cheng, he arrived early to the filming site.

No matter if he tried his best to be a normal person, no matter if he ripped out the Zerg wings with his own hands, the wounds on his body would still exist and never disappear.

Before encountering this game, Xi Guican had already been determined to die. He allowed himself to drown in the swamp, feeling the silt suffocate him as it filled his mouth and nose.

But, one day, in the hollow darkness, a ray of light suddenly penetrated the thick, dark clouds and landed on his face. He yearned for, loved, and desired to get close to this ray of light, but he knew that the light was only illusory, like a flower in the mirror, or a moon in the water. He can’t hold it with his grasp.

The beam of light shone on his face, his body, and the swamp. Following the light’s path, he reached out from the muck and plucked one star, and then another star……

Those stars then flew into the sky, and the dark night sky that had loomed over his head for so long was suddenly lit up by a plethora of shining stars.

They twinkled and shined like the song He Ruge was singing.

Twinkling and sparkling, a sky filled with stars hanging in the sky to shine. The faint starlight broke through the clouds, and sprinkled onto him from up high.

This was light. 

He Ruge was the light in his life, illuminating his dark world, illuminating the beauty hidden in the darkness that he has never discovered in the past.

Before meeting He Ruge, he always thought he would never be favored by fate. However, at this moment, when he looked up at the starry skies, Xi Guican realized that the stars above his head had always been there. But, they were blocked by the dark clouds that blinded his eyes, so he had never discovered the beauty of the world he lived in.

The first half of his life was spent sunken in the muck, so he also believed that the people and things around him were “debris in the same river”, “corrupted in filth”, and “unsightly.”1 But now, fate was telling him that it isn’t like that. 

Those people were just stars that had fallen from the sky.

The golden python was like this.

The little rabbit was also like this.

So, did that mean…… he was the same?

Did that mean he was not rotten to the bone? That the filth on his body was just silt and dust, such that when he washed them away, he would also become a star in the sky?

Xi Guican looked on quietly at the young man in front of him. After a long time passed, he whispered: “All of us will eventually become a star.”

So, I will also become a star.

“I seem to have never told you my name.”

It used to be the name of despair and death.

“Please always remember it.”

Now that he had regained his emotions.

“My name is Xi Guican. If I die one day, it means that I have finally become a star and have returned to brilliance.”

It was you who picked me up from the swampy muck and sent me to the skies.

{Please read the original translations on SurrealSkyTranslations instead of supporting TL aggregator sites. Thanks!}

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Footnotes:

同流合污, 污秽不堪, 不堪入目: 3 separate idioms that describe the idea that those in the same circumstance behave similarly. In this case, it would be “those stuck in the swamp have the same filth”


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6 thoughts on “WDBKFMGB Chapter 29 – Blowing up the Laboratory”

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