What to Do When I Become a Koi and Fall into the Male God’s Bathtub

WDBKFMGB Chapter 9 – His Knight

Hello! I decided to pick up WDBKFMGB because I really enjoy the author’s writing style and beautiful descriptions. This will also be my first read-through, so I will be reading at the pace that I translate. Thus, I will not be able to answer any questions pertaining to future events in the novel.

I am translating this novel as something to take up my time during COVID-19 isolation. If the original translator decides to pick up the novel again, I will still finish translating all the chapters. Though, I will not post them onto NovelUpdates. Still, feel free to read whichever translation you like. 🙂 Remember to keep track of you health, everyone!

Edited


When the takeout arrived, He Ruge quit the game and searched up “Your Exclusive Lover” while eating the takeout food. To his confusion, no information was found for the game. 

Is it possible that it was under the Beta phase? 
 

How did he download this game? He Ruge found that he seemed to have amnesia. Did he ever download this game? 

  
He couldn’t remember. Forget it, it wasn’t a big deal anyway. 
 

By the time He Ruge finished the takeout, opened the documents and sorted out the details, it was already past nine in the evening. He Ruge was a very regular person; he went to bed early, got up early, and ate 3 daily meals on time. Thus, he turned off the computer and went to the bathroom to wash up before bed. 
 

The bathtub was filled with warm water, and a little yellow ducky floated on top of the water. He Ruge’s cheeks had the red tinge from the evaporating heat as he stared at the little yellow ducky with affectionate eyes, turning it (around and around) with his fingers. He Ruge talked to himself: “Don’t look at me with such a cute expression while I’m bathing, I’m a little embarrassed.”

Killing the relaxed mood from bathing, He Ruge looked down at his feet—

A pair of slender legs overlapped each other, emitting an ivory glow under the water’s ripples, and strange blood-red lines emerged from the inner sides of his thighs, covering his skin like blood-red veined agate [1].

He Ruge flexed his legs experimentally and looked at the magnificent red, palm-length veins spread about.  

The lines were neatly arranged, as if it was an uncolored drawing outline of fish scales. His fingers stroked along the red lines, feeling the smooth and soft texture. It looked like a unique tattoo.   

(After the bath,) He Ruge hurriedly put on a bathrobe, opened Mother Du[2], and searched up “Strange diseases with red lines on legs.”

As we all know, one should go to a doctor when sick instead of searching randomly on Baidu, because if you search on the Internet, anything could range from a symptom of a cold to a fatal chronic illness.  

He Ruge put down his cell phone with a pale face, and sat in a daze. After a long period of silence, he logged on to Penguin and said to his good friend: “I have a very important announcement for you. I may not be able to write any more in the future.”  

Emotionless Coding Machine: “What’s wrong? Did you get angered senseless by your Sunspots[3]? You don’t need to mind those idiots. At a glance, you could already tell they’re all wretched males who want to seek revenge on society through the internet.” 

He Ruge: “???”

What sunspots? He had been addicted to playing games all day and hadn’t (had time to) look at his comments yet.

However, this wasn’t the main point. He Ruge took a deep breath and typed sadly: “No, I ……” 

He didn’t want to spread news that he might be terminally ill and make his good friend feel sad for himself, so He Ruge euphemistically said: “The world is so big, I want to go out and experience it.”

Emotionless Coding Machine: “You don’t have any money, are you going out to impoverish yourself to death? Can you even afford a plane ticket?”   

He Ruge: “……” 

The just-brewed bitter mood was completely wiped clean by poverty. 

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Emotionless Coding Machine: “You told me a few days ago that after entering V you’d have to work hard, otherwise you can’t even afford next month’s rent. Okay, okay, I understand. You work at a speed of 1,500, unlike my fast 5,000[4]. I’m not rushing you to complete 10,000 a day, but 6,000 a day is still necessary.”

He Ruge: “……Are you a demon?” 

Emotionless Coding Machine: “Enough. The stress (you feel) when you first start full-time work is quite high. If you’re sad, write. Turn your grief into strength. Your book is doing quite well. As long as you don’t collapse, I guarantee this book will explode (in popularity). If it doesn’t explode, I will live stream myself eating a keyboard. So, don’t worry for now.”   

Emotionless Coding Machine: “Right, are you going to do 10,000 a day tomorrow, too?”   

He Ruge tremblingly typed: “…… one day. The sky will collapse, but updates still need typing.” 

Emotionless Coding Machine: “Your learning capacity is good. If you don’t reach 10,000 a day tomorrow, I will kill you. I am going to go watch videos first, not chatting anymore. waves

He Ruge touched his face and then remembered that his good friend had said there were sunspots in the comments. 

Brushing hate[5]

He exited Penguin, opened JinJiang[6], and numbly clicked on his own work.

An eye-stinging “-2” showed up on the screen. 

The fire setting negative comments were a whole block of text:  

Netizen: Review for Chapter: 18   Rating:
The author described the antagonist in such a detailed manner, afraid that the author themself is that kind of disgusting person. 

1L: Qiu Qiu (Ball) 
Afraid they are not okay

2L: Summer’s Popsicle 
You are the one who is disgusting 

3L: Revenge on Society 
Peh, I can do it, I have many moonstones. Scold me that I am, too. I also won’t be courteous. 

Netizen: Review for Chapter: 7   Rating: -2 
Really Interesting. 

1L: Emotionless Coding Machine 
It is not the author who sprayed you, why are you brushing hate on the author? The author worked hard to write, and you’re ranting your emotions like this? 

Revenge on Society: Even this kind of disgusting person can become popular (-2 points)   
Revenge on Society: Really good to see (-2 points
Revenge on Society: Really, Really good to see (-2 points
Revenge on Society: No logic, hypocritical (-2 points
Revenge on Society: The emotions come from nowhere, Mary Sue’s (-2 points
Revenge on Society: The author needs to hide his face a bit (-2 points

This kind of person, at an immediate glance, was someone suffering from reality. So, he puts on a vest and retaliates on the Internet. He Ruge had seen much (in life) already, so he calmly reached over to click the report button, until he saw the latest negative comment:

Revenge on Society: The author is so disgusting, it’s obvious that this person does not have a mother’s teachings, whole family is dead[7].

Finally, there was a crack in his calm expression. He Ruge’s sight fell on the ID name; his hands clenched slowly and his nails pierced into his flesh, but He Ruge appeared to not have noticed. 

He seemed to be able to hear the deeply buried grief in his heart springing out of his chest, falling and falling deeper into the abyss where the end was nowhere in sight.  

He Ruge was an orphan. He didn’t know who his birth mother, whom he had never met, was, what their name was, whether they were living or dead, and why they didn’t want him.

Although, he also sometimes hated the woman who abandoned him, he never allowed anyone to insult her.

The youth sat motionlessly in front of the computer, remaining as still as a silent sculpture for a long time before raising his hand rigidly and scrolling down through the comments section. 

All the disgusting words that should not be seen, He Ruge read through them completely like self-abuse. He was a relatively new writer, with an update time at 12 noon, and it was currently 10 pm. Most readers who followed him would not look at the comments section at this time of day.

Except for really close friends, there would be no one else who communicated with him. 

The increase (in views for his work) was stagnant, but the comments section was a field of scolding, which greatly affected the opinions of passers-by. Originally, (the comment numbers) would rise more than more than 20 posts an hour, but it was now unmoving. 

(He Ruge’s) fingertips trembled slightly, and he slowly tapped on the keyboard in reply: “Please mind your words when you speak.” 

A strong logical mentality was the only reason why he didn’t retort with anything as improper as the opponent’s (words). He Ruge pushed up his glasses and reported each negative rating, reporting them as “purposely malicious negative comments.” However, while he was using the computer, JinJiang froze again, and the reporting interface was kept on the loading screen.  
   
In this era, keyboard masters could easily hide behind a screen to curse at people. It wouldn’t them cost much to utterly destroy the work of small, transparent authors.  

Entrusted with his efforts and dreams, (his new work) would be trampled all over, just like that. 

His straight back suddenly bent over, as if overburdened by weight of carrying too much harvested rice[8].

He Ruge took off his glasses, pushed aside his keyboard, and lay silently on the table. 

The inexplicable red lines on his legs appeared in his sight, and He Ruge felt that all of his strength was swallowed up by those lines. His remaining life seemed to begin its countdown. Maybe in the next second, or even tomorrow, he would leave the world early, leaving everyone behind, leaving holes unfilled and readers waiting to be fed. 

 If he……. were to die.   

 Would anyone feel sad for him? Who would be the first to find him dead? Maybe it would be the landlord who came to collect rent. If the house had a death, it must be difficult to rent out in the future. Thinking about it … he felt sorry the owner, too. 

 Under the shadows of death, many memories played out like marquees (in his head). 

He Ruge remembered the few deposits left on his bank card. The rent for next month was one thousand, and he would donate (the remaining) five hundred to the orphanage next month.

Next month was his birthday.    

In fact, he really wanted to own a cat 

He wanted to get a cat on his birthday and fulfill his long-time wish, so that he could have one more company. A full-time, lonely, single person, having cats would make him much happier.  

But now it seemed unlikely. He didn’t want the cat to follow him to eat dirt.

His head was in chaos, his desires and reality were fighting [9]. He Ruge remembered that when he visited the forums a few days ago, a full-time author posted a flaunting post. The full-time girl had cats and dogs. Her family supported her choice to write articles. She didn’t have to do housework or worry about what to eat for three meals a day. Her parents always couldn’t help showing her off, even if she was just a common street writer. 

Her parents would be proud of her and say- our family’s child is a famous author.    

 Our family’s……   

 Unsure why, that phrase touched He Ruge’s weakest point. He didn’t know whether it was because he was envious or jealous, but he wanted to store away that sense of overflowing happiness that seemed to flow between the lines of those words.    

 Soon, He Ruge fell asleep in front of the computer. He dreamt that his body was covered with strange red stripes and everyone avoided him. He fell into poverty and was forced to sleep on the overpass. Over there was a stray cat under the overpass, all skin and bones, but still fierce and frightening. He took a closer look at the kitten–  

It looked exactly like his little white tiger!  

The original nightmare turned into a beautiful dream, and He Ruge woke up unexpectedly calm. Instead of looking back at the comments section, he opened up “Your Exclusive Lover”.  

The game popped up the daily check-in screen. (Checking-in for) seven consecutive days would get you a chance to draw a prize. He Ruge clicked to sign-in and took the bottle to go feed the cubs.  

He consumed one little heart and opened the iron door of Room 20, looking at the little white tiger lying on the cotton nest. The Little White Tiger still has a bad look on its face, as if the whole world owed him money. He was as fierce as he was in the dream.  

However, He Ruge felt like he was cured. He looked down at the back of the little white tiger who started drinking the milk and felt that the pressures weighing down on his back had lessened a great deal. 

The round tiger ears trembled, and the little white tiger suddenly turned his head, its watery blue eyes staring at He Ruge. Its gaze looked so serious that even the milk stains on the corners of his mouth were affected by such a serious expression … becoming even more meng.  

The corner of his mouth couldn’t help rising, and He Ruge held out his hand, placing his fingertips on the screen over the position of the little white tiger’s forehead. He tapped on it softly. 

Flicking its tail, the Little White Tiger turned his head and finished the milk in a few sips. Then, he placed the bottle in front of He Ruge and sat with a very proper posture that made it seem as though it wanted to hold a formal discussion with He Ruge.  

If it was a normal day, He Ruge would definitely [talk] [touch] [feed], but today he didn’t have such a leisurely mood. For the sake his dog life, he had to go to the hospital to see a doctor! He believed he could still be saved! 

 Thus, when He Ruge went offline, he missed the Little White Tiger’s … serious and angry expression!    

* 
   
Xi Guican sat his butt down on the cold hard floor, not even in the mood to move to the soft cotton nest.

What happened? 

 He was very tired yesterday and directly slept in the game cabin. But, no matter how good the game cabin was, it wouldn’t be as comfortable as a large bed. Xi Guican was going to go offline after waking up, but then he looked at the time and saw that it was almost mealtime.   

En, it’s not because he wanted to see He Ruge first thing in the morning, he just wanted to drink some warm, hot milk. That’s why he continued to lie in the game cabin.

However, what Xi Guican didn’t expect was how his heart’s desired He Ru …… No, no, it was when his heart’s desired breakfast came, He Ruge left immediately after leaving the milk?!  

Was this proper? 

There was no candy to eat, and no song to listen to. Now, he wasn’t even willing to talk to him? He didn’t smile when he saw him, and his face was sad and melancholic. Was he losing his charm, or did the game program break from a bug[10]

The Little White Tiger acted like a sorrowful woman left alone in a vacant house, miserable and pitiful.

But, when he was about to go offline, he suddenly heard a sound from the game: 
   
[Di – – “You Exclusive Lover’s Guardian Knight” is officially beginning! 

There is a theory in love called “The more you pay, the more you care”. Love that has not been paid for is not satisfactory. 

 Your exclusive lover, He Ruge, has encountered difficulties. He Ruge wrote posts in JinJiang Literature City, and a keyboard master who was retaliating against society appeared in the comments area to curse at He Ruge.    

 As his lover, are you willing to protect him like a guardian knight, defend him, escort him, and create a safe haven for him?  

   If you are my guardian angel, then I will be your guardian knight ※】   

 The Little White Tiger who originally sported a bad expression, at this time, showed a terrifying one.

—— Who dares bully my people? 
—— I’ll bite them all to death! 


The Author has something to say: 

Little theaters should be read separately from the original texts. The character’s real personalities are still the ones in the text.  

Little theater 1:  
Xi Guichan: Tigers don’t show their power, pretend I am HelloKitty 

Little theater 2: 
He Ruge: I have an incurable disease, I’m going to die young, I haven’t even had time to get a cat, wu wu wu wu~~ 
Author: … No, you are just going to become a fish man… 


[1] Agate: type of stone with colored veins

[2] Baidu (China’s equivalent of Google)

[3] Sunspots: hater fans (or anti-fans)

[4] writing speed, characters per day

[5] Brushing Hate: Writing negative comments

[6] JinJiang: JJWXC

[7] WTF?! why would you even say this?!

[8] Back hunched over: can be taken metaphorically to represent someone overburdened by their responsibilities and ambitions

[9] His desires and reality were fighting: The Chinese phrase usage doesn’t translate well into English. Originally it was: Herb rice oil salt sauce vinegar tea were arguing. The base meaning is that everything deemed necessary was not in tune with one another, Ru Hege could not obtain everything he wanted and needed

[10] bug – originally typed in English


Index | Next

25 thoughts on “WDBKFMGB Chapter 9 – His Knight”

  1. Thanks for picking this novel up! I really missed it. The footnotes are a little wonky but that’s fine! Maybe hyperlinks linking the numbers in the passage to the numbers at the bottom would be good for ease of use tho!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Sorry about the footnotes. I tried using markdowns for footnotes, but it just ended up deleting the entire post before I saved it. So, I decided to just leave it alone LOL. I will get it on the next post! ୧(•v•)૭

      Liked by 1 person

  2. He Ruge needs a hug from his tiger!
    (・–・) \(=^・ェ・^=)/

    Who insults someone’s parents, when they dislike an author?

    That’s not only useless but also childish.

    Thanks for the chapter!

    Liked by 5 people

  3. I stuck this novel through a translation site about half a year ago but I’m so glad to be able to read this properly translated! It makes so much more sense and I don’t have to think as much because I understand more of what’s going on!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Hello! I am currently retranslating chapters 1-8 because the previous translator dropped it. They should be up before the end of September!! Thanks for your patience!

        Like

  4. Hi, i’m the original translator and I’m thankful that you have decided to pick up this. I’m have been busy and will still be unavailable for the next couple of weeks. I hate to leave any translating novel uncompleted! All the best and enjoy~

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Any chance of installing something on this site that will adjust word size?
    Any chance of installing something that can the page color to/from white to black?
    I, personally, find it easier to read if the page is black and if the words are larger in size.
    Also, thanks for the chapter(s).

    Like

    1. Hello! Unfortunately, to allow readers to change the page format, I will need to add plug-ins that are only available to business plans and up. If this site can earn enough to support a business plan, then I will definitely change it! However, that would be potentially next year (Or if I find some way to code it into the page itself).

      Like

  6. This looks like a good read! Looking forward to first few chapters’ translation and catching up with everyone!
    Thank you for your hard work!

    Like

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